When Alex was a baby, Rachel and I didn't let her watch TV. (For these purposes, baby is defined as under 18 months). We had read something, somewhere, in a parenting manual that suggested TV turns brains into Jell-O. A friend of my parents gave her a "Sesame Street Dance Party" video sometime after her first birthday, which formed her entire collection. We ended up watching it a lot.
A problem with contemporary, intense parenting is that kids need mom and dad's attention just about every moment of the day. The price of engagement in our kids' lives is the lack of disengagement. I realize that toddlers have always been needy, but sometimes when you look at old picture books you see images of Dad, home from work, sitting in the most comfortable chair in the living room, reading the newspaper. (Sometimes he smokes a pipe, so you know the picture is hopelessly archaic.) My kids would never tolerate this kind of separateness in their midst. I know this is why parents have to negotiate with the television devil.
When do our kids watch TV? They are entitled by longstanding precedent to PBS (Sesame Street, Clifford) in the morning when Mom and Dad are showering and getting dressed. This hour is like a non-refundable airline ticket. You can't exchange it if you sleep in and miss your plane. There is also some afternoon downtime, subject to Mom's whim. Andrew gave up his nap some months ago but can still be exhausted by midday. An hour of Wiggles, if it doesn't help him recharge, can at least suppress the whining. Also, when it seems clear that dinner isn't going to cook itself, the TV sometimes helps out in the five o'clock time slot.
We almost never have the TV on in the evening or at night. The exceptions are when babysitters are courting favor, or when we have company over and nobody wants to see the loose teeth or hear Andrew sing "Goodnight Irene" anymore.
The sickbay has some TV privileges, but not so terrific that children diagnose themselves too freely.
Alex is allowed to go downstairs and turn on the TV on weekend mornings, particularly if her parents feel like sleeping in. And like her Dad did some decades before her, Alex has discovered the joy of visiting friends' homes where the house policy is less strict.
Why do we regulate the TV so drastically? Because we find that when our children watch a little TV, they only want to watch more. They are like the rats in the lab experiments who can't stop dispensing drugs to themselves. But part of the concern is Rachel and I feel like we might get addicted, too.
